The path to becoming the man you want to be starts the moment you decide to make this change.We all get caught up in our own comfort zones and sometimes it works out for us.
It's not tomorrow or next week.
But the question you have to ask yourself is, "Have I reached my potential?"
See if this describes YOU:
- You might be the kind of guy that makes a New Year's resolution but ditches the plan after a few weeks or months.
- You may have wanted to talk to the attractive woman at the grocery store but didn't because you were afraid of being rejected.
- You just may be the kind of guy that doesn't know what he wants but knows enough that he wants to make a change.
The opinion people have of you may not be congruent with the view you have of yourself. It's very common for a group of friends to put your social status at the bottom of the totem pole because that is where you feel most comfortable.
You may not like it but it's all you have. You might try to rationalize all of these different reasons for why you're in the predicament you are in but eventually you come to the realization that you need to make a change.
So after you've decided that you want to make a change. What do you do?
There's no easy way around it. You have to make the decision to be the person you want to be and live as such. Nobody is going to hold your hand and bring you to the place you want to be. You have to reach between your legs and find your balls. Once you find your balls you have to confidently pursue your vision of becoming the man you want to be.
Your end goal should be to work on your holistic game enough that you are competent in each and every aspect. Evaluate where you are at and determine what necessary steps you need to take to becoming a more attractive male.
First off, you should identify your negative and positive traits.
Then write down the types of attributes you would like to acquire and find a role model who has these traits. Find out how they conduct themselves and how they developed their attitude. A great place to start is by looking at biographies of great men or observing people who have these attributes that you admire.
The first and immediate change you can make is on your physical appearance:
If your conversational skills aren't so proficient then go out and start talking to strangers. Growing up, many of us were told to avoid strangers but it is essential to becoming more socialized and likable. Engage yourself in social environments with lots of people so that you can cultivate a healthy social circle.
- Throw away the knitted sweater your aunt made for you four Christmas's ago and update your wardrobe.
- Get a stylish haircut, smile more, and essentially make yourself look good.
- When you start looking good you start feeling good.
There are plenty of friendly people out there who can help you get more comfortable in social settings.
These are just a few examples of what you can do to improve yourself immediately. The path to becoming the man you want to be starts the moment you decide to make this change.
It's not tomorrow or next week.
Or it will be never because you will be making a lifetime of excuses not to change because of fear and self-loathing.
You have to overcome your limiting beliefs of what is possible. Don't let anyone else convince you that you are less than what you believe yourself to be.
Live the life of the man you want to be. You may not feel too congruent with the new attitude and look you will develop but you will definitely experience some success. Success brings confidence and competence. Begin to do things that will fit your new lifestyle.
If you've been playing video games and watching TV for your whole life then you may want to consider adopting some new hobbies. If you want to be more adventurous then start doing adventurous activities like rock climbing. If you want to be more cultured then start exploring new places, read about different topics and go to places where you can talk to people about it.
You don't have to completely change yourself, but once you go past your comfort zones you can start to blend together all of the positive attributes that make you who you are. Experience heavily influences how you conduct yourself and when you create those experiences you become more authentic.
You have to be committed to living the life of the person you want to be. That should be easy if you have the right reasons for wanting to make the change. Regardless, if you get off of your ass and do something about it then you're on the right track. Your life is what you make of it and with the right guidance and hard work you can reach your goals.
To command respect you have to give yourself respect. To be an interesting person you have to feel that you are interesting. It doesn't start with people giving you the validation of being interesting or having them respect you. You must be the leader in how you want others to perceive you. This is something that you simply accept as truth and get experience in making it a belief.
The only thing holding you back is yourself.
Remember, nobody can answer that question but you.
- Are you living the life of the person you want to be?
- Are you satisfied with the quality of your relationships?
- Are you living the lifestyle that you want to be living?
When you find the answer to these questions, start making a change now.
The only person holding you back is yourself.
Labels: 10 Pillars of Inner Strength, Holistic Game