When I Make a Student Cry, I'll Refund His Check

I don't mean to rag on the poor guy. I mean, he did REALLY well during the actual class. He did all his homework, listened attentively, asked many insightful questions, and you could see the improvements he was making in the class exercises from the first day to the next. He was prepared for classwork. But despite everything Groove and I did, he WAS NOT ready for the fieldwork.

My refund policy now has another rule, executed at my discretion.

  1. Cancellation: Cancelling a bootcamp requires one month of advance notice from the date of the scheduled class for a full refund. The deposit is forfeit if you cancel past that deadline.
  2. Re-scheduling: To re-schedule a program requires 2 weeks advance notice or a late re-scheduling fine of 15% (of balance due) is imposed.
  3. First Night Refund: If for whatever reason you are unsatisfied after the first night of a program (bootcamps only), balance due will be refunded minus a 15% cancellation fee. Deposit is non-refundable.
  4. If I Make You Cry: If you cannot handle the intensity of the program, I will use my discretion as to cancel the bootcamp and whether or not to refund (and how much) your balance due. Deposit is forfeit.

Gentlemen, I'm not bullshitting you when I say that the Exclusive Mentorship 1on1 Bootcamp is NOT for the weak of heart. It can be, and usually is, an intense, life changing ASS WHOOPING. But ONLY if you're prepared and ONLY if you're willing to give it your all in the field.

Please read the following 2007 description CAREFULLY.

Exclusive Mentorship (1on1)
Exclusive Tutorship. Three days and three nights of an intense ABCs of Attraction bootcamp with Asian Playboy himself. Only men dedicated to improving, becoming better, and wanting to be WINNERS need apply.

Not for the weak of heart, the timid, and the doubtful.

Approach Anxiety MUST be manageable (ie on a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is terrified, nor more than a 6 or 7).

Only ONE Mentorship program per month.

Client is responsible for all travel/lodging arrangements and other business related expenses (taxi, club cover, etc). USA only.

Having said that, I sincerely DO want you- my client and Asian brother- to succeed. But do NOT waste my time if you can't take the heat. You may be all cool guys, and we can laugh all about the crazy intensity of the bootcamp experience, but during an APB Program isn't the place. I want your best and you need to do what needs to be doing.

I don't mean to rag on the poor guy. I mean, he did REALLY well during the actual class. He did all his homework, listened attentively, asked many insightful questions, and you could see the improvements he was making in the class exercises from the first day to the next. He WAS prepared for classwork. But he wasn't ready for the fieldwork despite everything Groove and I did.

It's not necessarily his fault either. Society, school, and family can really brainwash and program limiting beliefs. I remember absolutely stressing on the phone that:
  1. He sounded scared and if he couldn't get commit, not to waste each other's time. Seriously, if he wasn't ready for 30 hours of hard work and hard play, he shouldn't waste his money... I don't need it.
  2. He needed to get out in the field more before coming to Dallas. Scared newbies I can teach and hammer into shape. Petrified ones, though, shouldn't think about doing a 1on1 with me.
Intellectually, he's got what it takes to make it happen. NOW, though, he's got to execute in real life before taking the big plunge.

For him and those newbies like him, I recommend the following babysteps:
  1. Try smiling to everyone at the mall. Just see if you can SMILE and make eye contact.
  2. Start saying "Hello" to everyone you meet in a day especially random passerbys.
  3. Chat up a regular conversation with any daytime hired gun (waistress, hotel clerk, cashier, etc.).
  4. Start going out maybe once a week.
  5. Approach night hired guns (they have to talk to you).
  6. Start approaching a couple of all girl sets and lone wolves each night.
  7. Rack up anywhere from 20 to 50 sets or until your AA is MANAGEABLE by the time of bootcamp.
You'll get a lot more out of ANY pick up program if you can get to this point.

For him, Approach Anxiety became an absolute killer no matter how many times Groove and I demonstrated. For example, during the first half of Saturday on St. Patrick's day, I let him see if he could do his own approaches based off of the first night's burgeoning results.

After he did only one set and several turnarounds, I tried to get him rolling by demoing several approaches which opened PERFECTLY, pulled him in, and used BLP (Body Language Positioning) to mini-isolate everyone else away from his girl.

The poor guy just froze each time.

Then I tried getting him pumped up and drunk once it became obvious he couldn't change his state without additional help. During the second late night half, I did several more sets (including mixed), all of which went perfectly with no blowouts, merged him in, and took the guy(s) out.

Again, analysis paralysis reared it's ugly head. At the end of the night, I simply gave him his check back in full even though he'd taken two full sessions at that point.

Maybe I could and should have been nicer, more understanding, and done more hand holding. There are easier programs to take, but a 1on1 with me isn't one of them.

So to you, I apologize for being hard so hard on you, but that's the way I roll and teach. I expect your best and I don't take any excuses.

To everyone else, I always state at the beginning of any Exclusive Mentorship 1on1 Bootcamp that I am not the following things (not all are applicable to the former student in question, mind you):

The Asian Playboy is Not:
  1. I am not your Mommy or your Daddy. I am the Football Coach everyone on the team hates. I am the Drill Sargeant everyone in the barracks secretly fantasizes of "accidentally shooting." A better example is to think of me like Pai Mei from "Kill Bill." You WILL learn this skill and be successful, or you will die trying. You can thank me later when you get laid using the ABCs of Attraction.
  2. I do not care if you threaten to write me a bad review. Go for it. My style of teaching probably isn't the best and it's certainly not for everyone. But it's who I am and how I teach. If you give me your best, then we can relax and have the kind of crazy fun most frat boys only dream about. Waste my time when I could be enjoying MY holiday time with my friends and girls and you'll definitely get the ass reaming nightly debrief from hell.
  3. I am neither an Entertainment Monkey nor Babysitter. If you need me to, I'll do demo sets and merge you in. But do not walk away because you're uncomfortable standing alone by yourself. OBSERVE me. LEARN. It annoys me when I'm trying to help out and the student walks away. When I motion to bring you in, GO in and TALK to the girls. I'm not doing this for my health. I'm doing this for the student. And when I mini-isolate you with your girl, TALK to her. Do not act like a mute or, worse yet, simply stare at me as if I was Gaming you. If I wanted to do my own sets and have my own fun, I wouldn't be using my weekend/holiday for the client. I'd be out having a good time with my friends and homegirls.
  4. I am not Dr. Phil or your Psychologist. I teach a skill. That's it. Maybe this skill will change your thinking process and lifestyle, but it isn't designed to auto-magically make you superhuman. It isn't NIRVANA. Just by becoming good with women doesn't necessarily make you enlightened and permanently happy. Also, if you are broken, learning a skill won't fix you. I can offer some advice, but I'm not here to repair something that's broken mentally or emotionally. Sometimes the experience is life changing enough that students decide to become better men and improve their lives by changing their mediocre lifestyle. But I'm no doctor who can magically fix broken circuitry.
  5. I am neither Mystery nor Style. I've had some crazy experiences, fried multiple Buying Temperature Circuits in women, gotten laid during bootcamps, but I've also had bad nights and average nights and good nights. I've been at this for 3 years, but I'm still far from Mystery's going on 10 years of field experience. So HAVE reasonable expectations that aren't derived from pornographic fantasies. Demanding to see me makeout with a girl within 5 minutes, get laid EVERY night, and other outlandish demands just pisses me off. Pick Up has always been a numbers Game (it's about improving your percentage that matters) and I've never claimed otherwise. I didn't fly across the country to be your wingman doing all the work for you. The student needs to do his 110% share of the lifting.
The thing is, my "Tough Love, Without the Love (tm)" style of 1on1 Bootcamps really aren't for those who are going to waste my time. It's not for the idlely curious nor for the petrified. Group bootcamps and the Introductory Class to the ABCs of Attraction are usually better for that as they don't have the same no holds barred intensity that "rivals crazy drunk frat boys."

If this turns you off, then it's probably a good thing. The personalized 1on1 bootcamp isn't for everyone nor should it ever be. It CAN be life changing and intense, but it's not for those who can't overcome fear, refuse to improve, and won't MAKE something happen despite all the tools I give you.

Signed, Asian Playboy

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