[TIPS/VIDEO] Nonverbal Game, Part 2: Breaking Down Mystery's Live Video Sarge Example

I'm not positing that Verbal Game ISN'T important, but that Nonverbal Game (and the lack thereof) can make or break ANY verbal communication. It can dramatically enhance your verbal content up to four times OR it can give lie to your words and blow you out.

Previously, I discussed how Nonverbal Game can subcommunicate a great deal of unspoken value that makes it equally as powerful as Verbal Game, if not more so.

There's a pretty good discussion going on in the AznLover.Net forums. One of its members, IamManh (also part of the SoCal Lair and one of Johnny Wolf's wings), makes a point that improper Verbal Game versus proper Verbal Game can still blow a guy out.

On the pro-Verbal Game side, he uses the example of Mystery's Live Video Sarge where Eric von Markovich has to plow through multiple shit tests with the correct verbal response to succeed with an antagonistic girl.

Quote by IamManh

That video proves that passive value itself is not enough. Strong frame and tight calibration matters hell of a lot.

Verbal differences
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara who?"
HB: "Sara Garret"

Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara garret, nice to meet you, I'm mystery"

Boom, he's done.

Which I agree with to a certain extent. But even with the "right words", you can still shoot yourself in the foot if you have bad Nonverbal Game. And with the right Verbal Game AND the right Nonverbal Game, you make the message you're conveying that much more powerful.

I'm not positing that Verbal Game ISN'T important, but that Nonverbal Game (and the lack thereof) can make or break ANY verbal communication. It can dramatically enhance your verbal content up to four times OR it can give lie to your words and blow you out.

The example given above (using only the words spoken) leaves out the very important unspoken subtext of delivery. If one considers different possible ways the scenario could have played out, you can see why and how one can make any conversation succeed or fail regardless of words.

I'll give some examples...

(Without subtext)
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara who?"
HB: "Sara Garret"

(With incorrect subtext)
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
[CONFRONTATIONAL. ARROGANT.]
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara who?"
[STUTTERING. TAKEN ABACK. INTIMIDATED.]
HB: "Sara Garret"
[STILL BLOWN OUT.]

(With correct subtext)
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
[TEASING, CONFIDENT, PLAYFUL TONALITY. DIRECT EYE CONTACT.]
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara who?"
[NO HESITATION. UNIMPRESSED.]
HB: "Sara Garret"
[NOT BLOWN OUT. HE REMAINS A CHALLENGE TO HER. ALPHA.]

(With incorrect subtext)
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
[TIMID TONALITY. NOT MAKING EYE CONTACT. FAKING CONFIDENCE.]
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara garret, nice to meet you, I'm mystery"
[INGRATIATING TONALITY. FAKE SMILE. PLACATING. AVOIDING KINO AND EYE CONTACT. SUBMISSIVE.]

(With correct subtext)
Mystery: "So who the hell are you missy"?
[RELAXED. DOMINANT. MAYBE EVEN AMUSED. CONFIDENT.]
HB: "Sara fucking garret"
Mystery: "Sara...
[SAID SLOWLY... PAUSE... DIRECT EYE CONTACT.]
garret[?]
[CONFUSED AS IF TO WHY HE SHOULD BE THE SLIGHTEST BIT IMPRESSED.]
nice to meet you,
[GENUINE SMILE. WARMTH.]
I'm...
[SLOW HANDSHAKE AND KINO. DIRECT, ALPHA EYE CONTACT.]
mystery"
[MAINTAINING KINO. SLOW TONALITY. CONVEYING AN ATTITUDE NEITHER UNIMPRESSED NOR TAKEN ABACK BY SHIT TESTING. BASICALLY NOT ACKNOWLEDGING THE SHIT TEST AND- MOST ESPECIALLY- MOVING THE SARGE FORWARD WITH KINO AND SLOWER, DOMINANT, ALMOST SEXUAL TONALITY.]

We then move on to talk about "frame control" and "social calibration" which I'll dig into later in this ongoing series. and how both are examples of tight Nonverbal Game.

Both skills are a composition of multiple parts that forms a greater whole. So feel free to comment here and in the forums!