"At this point I need a bit of inspiration so I ask APB to open a set for me. He walks in, opens a three set and I can see the girls light up.Here is Pawnstar's "Graduation Night" so to speak. While we did see Quentin Tarentino (and a midget), Sunday (Day 4) was pretty dead because the typical nightspot had a backup DJ because the big name dude got into a car accident (not to mention feeling exhausted). Alas.
He merges me into the set and as I approach, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this set is mine for the taking."
-Pawnstar (Sydney, Australia)
Pawnstar has a great amount of potential. He did well in the majority of the exercises from improvising, tonality, and story telling. I disagree with his thought that he's not creating attraction, there's definitely attraction as witnessed by IOIs like the girl(s) sticking into set, eye contact, responding, laughter and so forth. Maybe not the greatest and strongest forms of IOIs, but Indicators of Interest they are.
He approached typically without fear and when he was in set, he was well into set, but creating the inital major attraction on the approach alone (via direct or indirect) proved difficult as was plowing in a flubbed approach or if the set was closed off to begin with. The latter is due to external circumstances, but the former, stems from the fact that, whether it was a canned, natural, or direct opener, he felt the situation was contrived which is, in my opinion, a purely socially programmed inhibition... a case of inner thoughts sabotaging outer game...
Why else would women wear their hottest hootchie outfits, pay for overpriced drinks, to dance and listen to music in overcrowded venues? For the emotional high it provides... including being attracted and seduced by cool, interesting, attractive men. Women WANT men to approach them. They just don't want creepy guys to approach them.
You've got to push, even when you're uncomfortable... ESPECIALLY when you're uncomfortable in order to inure oneself to both real and imagined social pressure and get past that sticking point. Sets can be turned around if improperly approached, but yes, it does take more work and is a sticking point that afflicts beginning to intermediate students.
The rest, I believe, comes from field experience and believing in one's approach wholeheartedly. Have a good flight back to Australia, my Asian brother!
At the moment I'm feeling like Pyro from X-Men. For those of you who are unaware, Pyro is a mutant whose power gives him the ability to control a flame but not to create it. How on Earth does this relate to pick up?
Well tonight I was happy with my ability to control an already opened set but I wasn't actually able to open a set and create the attraction.
We start off at a bar that's pretty empty. I open a seated set for a warm up and it starts stalling pretty quickly. At this point, I have the option of plowing through but I eject. Why?
Because even with my limited experience I know what a "good" set feels like and it sure doesn't resemble pushing shit up a hill, which is exactly what I'm doing here. I can wait for a better spot.
We hit our next bar and I'm stalling in my approaches. I'm not consciously aware of it at the time but I think that at some level I realise that my approaches are pretty bad and I'm having trouble overcoming the inertia. After a couple of misses, I force myself to approach a two set at the bar. I don't "stick" my approach and once again, instead of plowing I eject.
APB then opens a hired gun and we fluff talk for a few minutes. I then go and open a two set and once again, I feel I haven't nailed the approach. This time I plow through anyway. I'm not getting anywhere. I keep plowing. I'm staying in set but my progress is static. They tell me they're going to another bar. APB and I leave for the warehouse district.
We head over to "Glass" which is the site of my two best sets of the trip. The first set was on day one, opened by APB. Katie was really warming up to me on the night until her friend dragged her away.
The second set was on day two, opened by me. The opening wasn't great but through a fortuitous intervention of fate I was automagically isolated with the girl and I could focus on what I consider the strongest part of my game, one on one with the target. Things were going pretty well until once again the friend dragged her away.
By night three, I consider "Glass" as my "home turf". I open up a lone wolf. Some guy comes along and it turns out to be her cousin. So I befriend the guy and get back to my target. However, I'm not getting any IOIs from this one so I eject again.
At this point I need a bit of inspiration so I ask APB to open a set for me. He walks in, opens a three set and I can see the girls light up. He merges me into the set and as I approach, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this set is mine for the taking.
From here on it's pretty smooth sailing. The funny thing is I was running exactly the same game with all the sets that night. With the sets that I opened, I felt like I was pushing a giant boulder up a very steep hill. With the set that APB opened, I felt like I was pushing a snowball down the hill.
Everything was basically taking care of itself and I just occasionally had to give the thing a little tap to keep it rolling. After the opening APB didn't have to do any further work he just sat back chilling on the lounge.
This is not to say that my game was perfect. In fact there were still a lot of holes there that APB was pointing out to me. But hey, there was more kino than the night before and I ended up grinding with her for a little while on the dance floor.
I didn't get the full make out session but was kissing her on the forehead and neck.
My biggest two mistakes of the night were getting greedy and not managing the logistics.
The cutest girl in the set was definitely Jessica the friend. When my target disappeared for a bit I started gaming the friend and APB said to me "Stick to your target". Even I realised it was a mistake but I'm only human and the friend was really hot.
[APB: The remedy for that is waiting before choosing and locking in the target. Befriending the peer group and thereby creating attraction with said hotter girl. At the point you initiated sexual kino and kissing was the point of no return since friends aren't going to screw over their friendship for a random guy.]
The other mistake I made was mishandling the logistics. While my target was away, I concentrated all my attention on the hottie whilst ignoring the third friend, who had driven them all there.
At the end of the night, APB made the hilarious but true comment "You ignored the fattie which was a mistake because she was the one handling all the logistics for the group".
So now it comes to the point where I ask what can I take away from the whole experience?
Well firstly my sticking points are: approaching, body language and sexual assertiveness. However, I don't want to concentrate too much on the negatives because there are far more positive things than I can take away.
Firstly, I know that I can approach, which was something I couldn't do back home.
Secondly, even if I can't quite "stick" my approach at least I'm capable of reading the situation and I know where I stand and I can tell when I miss.
Lastly I know that once I have a properly approached set, I can work it will enough to get a number or kiss close.
-Pawnstar (Sydney, Australia)
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