It always feels good when someone is not only trying to proactively take control of their dating and sexual lifestyle by asking for advice, but then immediately going out there and DOING IT!
Submit all your dating, seduction, and pick up questions for the Dear Asian Playboy advice column here. That's what the "Asian Hitch" and #1 Asian Dating Coach is here for!
So congratulations to our young Asian brother for taking to heart my article "Asian Men & Black Women: Dating's Final Frontier."
Details have been changed to protect the innocent and not so innocent.
Dear Asian Playboy, I need some guidance with this black girl I met!
So I read your blog about black girls and asian men the other day, and it really inspired me to take action with this black girl I know from school. She's 21 (I'm 19), who goes to my uni and lives in downtown.
We met during orientation last month when she actually talked to me first, we talked a little bit but we stopped talking, probably maybe because she was annoyed or thought that I didn't want to talk to her because I didn't really try.
But a few days ago she said hi to me and we hit it off really well, talking about partying and weed and shit like that lol. Then the next day during lunch she said we should do something after school sometimes, so I asked for her number and got it.
Then it was just a little bit of chatting for the next few days. My question is, what should should I do now?
PS：I'm completely socially retarded and noob with women haha.
Thanks!
Yellow Chocolate
Way to go Mr. Chocolate! First of all, thanks for being a part of the community and for connecting with me on facebook!
It sounds like you have a pretty typical situation: A girl is interested in you and you are
- Telling yourself she's not interested in you ("But we stopped talking, probably maybe because she was annoyed or thought that I didn't want to talk to her because I didn't really try.") and
- You're not taking the lead, which is the job of the man in this type of relationship
In reality, the conversation between you two probably ended because you weren't adding anything to further it. A conversation goes both ways and it's important to continue adding value so that both parties enjoy it, which is probably what happened in your most recent conversation.
- TIP: Have interesting, fun (TRUE) stories about your life, but also equally importantly, your VALUES! Show her you're a man who's ambitious, outgoing, and doesn't take B.S. from people!
Good for you for getting the number, as that's the first step to being in control of when you see her. Now, what you need to do is set up an activity that you and she can both take part in, in order to get to know her better and escalate your relationship (we call this a "date" ;) ).
At the ABCs of Attraction, we recommend nonstandard dates (read: FUN and CREATIVE) that will be fun for both of you, as well as something she's never done before. Recently, I've been taking girls to the museum and we've had a great time from getting our culture on, the painting classes on premises, as well as wine tasting. All in one fun!
Also, my instructor, Gareth Jones, will take girls to the planetarium and then out for coffee. The point of a date is to get to know more about each other and to increase game time, while doing something engaging and (preferably) exciting.
- TIP: Find an event or activity near you (Lasertag, Museum, Planetarium, Beach, Art Show) and make a trip of it, maybe bring a picnic lunch or dinner for before or after and tell her how much fun it's going to be.
In our upcoming iGame: From Text to Sex DVD series, we lay out EXACTLY how to get her out on that date and how to escalate from there, but I think that right now, taking her on a date will be just the push you need.
Good luck and report back!Labels: Black Women, Dear Asian Playboy, First Date, iGame: From Text to Sex, Phone Close
