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Podcast: How to keep a girl interested in you over the long term

Podcast Episode For 4/26/09: (complete episode) : F: Fun or Fake? - How to keep a girl interested in you over the long term.

  • Chapter 1: Dating Advice: How to keep a girl interested in you over the long term. (download this chapter)

  • Chapter 2: Q & A - Better Asian Man fields all of your questions about how to meet ladies -- LIVE! (download this chapter)
    1. "I just got out of a bad breakup and I feel that it's affecting my life. How do I get out of this rut?" - Coolie High, New York, NY
    2. "Is it ok to approach girls in the daytime?" - Mr. K, Philadelphia, PA
    3. "What do you think of the gym as a place to do pickup? (i.e., meet girls) - Coolie HIgh, New York, NY

  • Chapter 3: Asian American Stuff: Better Asian Man interviews Peter Mui, Founder, www.YellowMan.com (download this chapter)

Listen to this week's podcast now.

Download this episode.

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Dear Asian Playboy: "Defend Us From the Haters!"


Dear Asian Playboy,
This is a message to the founders.

I like your product and what you are trying to do but there is one problem. Asian males have some enemies.

We all know the media likes to make us look like dorks and a lot of people out of whatever kind of hatred encourage those images.

So the problem with this public site is that it is a tool for those haters to point to and say hey look at how dorky those Asian guys are.

So can you put an intro note in the front page explaining how because other ethnic guys have been pursuing Asian women so much, it forces Asian men to branch out.

This way we can defend ourselves when the haters try to use this site as evidence that Asian men like white women the most but just can't get them.

Please for everyone's sake, just add the introduction.

-Anonymous Asian
Hey bro,

Sorry for not getting back to you immediately, I wanted some time to give you a well thought out response, like so:

Adding a footnote on the website to explain the ABCs of Attraction's reasons and motivations for existing would certainly be one way for you to "defend yourself." An even better way would be to live a life that allows you to be the change you want to see in the world-- or better yet, to help your fellow Asian American brothers become that change as well.

Outsiders have called us dorky, currently do call us dorky, and will continue to call us dorky. That is an external eventuality that would be fruitless to fight against. Independent of anything that those outsiders can say or do, hundreds of Asian American men who have been man enough to take responsibility for their lives have indeed manned up, taken our program, and moved on to romantically connect with women throughout the US and all over the world.

Yes, during the time that they are working the kinks out of their game, they are certainly an object for someone to "point at," as you say. However, if that be the only eventuality that is inadvertently caused by the existence of the
ABCs of Attraction, I can guarantee you that it is a miniscule price to pay for the immense impact that those students have had, and currently do have, on the psyche of the masses of women that they are currently romantically connecting with, as well as the jealous "guy friends" and former lovers of those women.

Have you ever observed one of my students taking over the complete attention and affection of a white woman (who probably has never met an Asian American man), while her white "guy friends," (who have never been challenged by an Asian American man) stand idly by holding their cocks? No amount of disclaimers written on a website can ever compare to the positive impact on society such incidents create for we Asian American men.

Lastly, an acknowledgement of the haters' viewpoints would serve to show that we are not proud of who we are and what we are trying to do with our own lives. If you haven't already, take a quick look at some of the blog entries on either the APB blog or at Better Asian Man (or any other ABCs affiliated blogs).

BAM is merely the perspective of one student of the
ABCs of Attraction, but it serves to show you that a man can take full 100% ownership of his defects, his "dork" qualities, and his former inability to romantically connect with women, and STILL turn it all around and wear it on his chest like a badge of honor and still get lots of romance in his life.

Trust me when I tell you that all of the "dorky" and "loser" qualities that are discussed on either on that blog, or on the
ABCs of Attraction website, have never hindered his ability to romantically connect with women. On the contrary, they've actually helped him (and others like him) increase and expand their love life 100 times over.

-JT the Asian Playboy

P.S. Feel free to Contact Us and send in your comments and questions!

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The Holistic Path, Part 1: Beyond Indirect, Beyond Direct, & WAY Beyond Natural Game

"It can be very easy to get caught up in the midst of each new tidal wave of tactical attraction material, with each new emotional high causing cult-like hysteria. The emotional imbalance caused by the Pick-Up Arms Race staggers the mind and splinters a Community."
Asian Playboy being broody...With the advent of the PUA community into the American zeitgesit, came an unending deluge of information about how to attract women from an endless list of self-proclaimed pick-up mascots gurus.

(Ironically- with tongue firmly in cheek- I am forced to include myself in this foppish esteemed category even though I stumbled fell into this calling occupation more by happenstance and accident rather than by design. Note my brooding stare. Can you feel the gravitas?)


It can be very easy to get caught up in the midst of each new tidal wave of tactical attraction material, with each new emotional high causing cult-like hysteria. The emotional imbalance caused by the Pick-Up Arms Race staggers the mind and splinters a Community.

It gets to a point where many people attempt to specialize in a certain aspect of game like indirect, direct, natural, or no game. There are Systems based companies and those based off of Cult of Personalities. Each style of game and their associated guru comes with their own pros and cons and are not limited to the aforementioned types.

But, for the sake of discussion, let's talk about the primary schools of practical based pick-up and seduction...

Canned (ie indirect) material focuses primarily (but not exclusively) on routines which can often times come across as fake. On one hand, it has the benefit of giving the inexperienced man a conventional script of responses and emotional responses, to slowly gain the kind of social and emotional intelligence he should have learned earlier on like most of his peers.

On the other hand, it can cause longer term problems when the interaction strays from the scripted conversation and will usually cause the woman to lose interest when she realizes that you're just a phony. Its strength as a constrained conversational playground, then becomes its weakness as the would be social butterfly tries to leave the confines of canned and stumbles into the social paradox: a script can get your foot in the door, but it won't take you all the way home.

Although canned material does have its uses, its purpose is the same as training wheels on a bicycle. The job of canned material is to help you when your brain farts and you don't know what to talk about. You'll find it extremely difficult to memorize days worth of routines and it's simply not practical.

Direct game, in my opinion, is a subset of "natural game" so let's talk about that...
"Those who usually do well with natural game are those who already have a lot of passive value that women are more forgiving of the mistakes that are made."


It's interesting to see such popularity in learning what has been coined, "natural game". Throughout my years of social experience I have observed that naturals are generally only good at one or two things and they stick to this method of attracting women exclusively. They stumbled upon something that worked or, more likely, simply "landed in their lap" (ie got lucky) and unconsciously practiced it because it resulted in positive rewards.

Many in the community look up to this style of game because it is reminiscent of the type of guys they saw getting women in the past. So understandably these students of game would attempt to copy that style.

Natural game is exactly what it is. It's free-flowing and unscripted. However, the problem with natural game is that those who practice it are usually good with one or two things as opposed to Holistic Game which incorporates every aspect of one's self to achieve greater success. Natural game is quite scattered sometimes and can cause you to make more mistakes with women because of the lack of structure.

Or, worse, you start to unconsciously internalize bad habits
because the random positive reinforcement from the occassional correct course of action causes you to dismiss the negative stimuli. Those who usually do well with natural game are those who already have a lot of passive value that women are more forgiving of the mistakes that one makes.

In other words, being good looking or tall means you can make more mistakes than the average guy can.

Natural game can work, but the success achieved depends a great deal on passive value and is predicated on only working in different settings.

For example, if your strength is to escalate sexually with a woman quickly and that is your primary method of game; then you'll find it difficult to attract the woman at the coffee shop without any other skill set. Alternatively, if your strength is in making a woman laugh but you don't escalate; then you'll end up being alone at a nightclub.

Natural game comes with it's pros and cons and unless you're a good-looking guy with a lot of experience with women then you'll find it difficult to achieve any success.

What if I told you that you could be yourself, get the women that YOU choose,, don't have to rely on routines to do it, create a healthy lifestyle that YOU enjoy under YOUR OWN terms, and still maintain good relationships with the people you meet? That sounds like a tall order but it can be done and I will explain to you how it can be accomplished.

This is Holistic Path...
"Holistic game is a combination of possessing excellent communication skills, both verbal and non-verbal, and the correspondingly superior, internally generated confidence."


What does holistic game cover?

Holistic game is a combination of possessing excellent communication skills, both verbal and non-verbal, and the correspondingly superior, internally generated confidence. It includes developing a powerful core personality that attracts all types of people to you. It is your mental toughness and the ability to achieve any goal you set for yourself and developing excellent physical health. It is the combination of developing one's Inner Strength in parallel with one's Outer Confidence and Verbal Prowess.

It is the synthesis of both your lifestyle with the actual improvements of your technical skillset and the cultivation of the mind-body link.

It is the jack of all trades and master of none.

It is flexibility over slavish devotion.

It is versatility over rigidity.

It is substance over form.


When you put all of those components together; you get a complete, superior and confident male. When you refine your Holistic Game, all types of people will be drawn to you. Specifically the beautiful women that you choose.

Holistic Game allows you to refine those positive attributes that make you who you are and presents it to others in a way that they too can see what makes you such a great person to be with. Whether or not you know it, you already possess the attributes to becoming that confident man who has selection with women.

All we do at the ABCs of Attraction is to help SHOW you the Holistic Path, to show you the vast array of OPTIONS and CHOICES that you have where you can not only become great with women but become the best man you can be.

It is then ultimately up to each individual HOW they walk down that path and what winding forks and roads they choose to take on their journey.

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Podcast: Asian American Superheroes

Podcast Episode For 4/19/09: (complete episode) : Better Asian Man interviews the Editors of Secret Identities: The Asian American Superhero Anthology
  • Chapter 1: Asian American Stuff: Better Asian Man interviews the Editors of Secret Identities: The Asian American Superhero Anthology (download this chapter)
  • Chapter 2: Dating Advice: What is Social Circle Game, and why is it important? (download this chapter)
  • Chapter 3: Q & A - Better Asian Man fields all of your questions about how to meet ladies -- LIVE! (download this chapter)

    1. "I'm dating a girl right now. She wants an exclusive relationship, but that's not what I want with her right now. What should I do?" - Mr. G, Philadelphia, PA
    2. "Should I include girls in my social circle, even if they're unattractive?"
Listen to this week's podcast now.

Download this episode.

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FAQ: Glossary of ABCs of Attraction Terms

I've updated the Frequently Asked Questions on the corporate site to include an extensive, but far from complete, list of common terms that the ABCs of Attraction uses with definitions.

The glossary includes common PUA Acronyms as well as those specific to the ABCs.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT US
  1. Do you teach only Asian men?

  2. What's the Refund Policy?

  3. What is the Early Bird discount?

  4. What is the Pay in Full discount?

  5. Do you have a glossary or definition list of all the ABCs of Attraction terminology?

  6. Will you be teaching in my Area [Insert City/State/Country]?

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Demand Asian Playboy to Visit YOUR City!

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellooooooooooooooo... [INSERT YOUR CITY HERE]!

You know, one of the vagaries of the itinerate lifestyle that I lead is that I usually only teach and visit those cities where I'm most in demand, like:
  • San Francisco, CA
  • New York City, NY
  • Las Vegas, NV
  • Sydney, Australia
  • Etc



Demand Asian Playboy in your city!
Learn more about the Eventful Demand for Asian Playboy

View all Asian Playboy tour dates

However, I get visitors and readers around the world and I've done one off bootcamps in exotic locals like Brazil, London, and the not so exotic Toronto, Canada. I'll get emails asking if I'll do a bootcamp in- say- Boston but there usually there isn't enough CONSISTENT demand (or at least VOCALIZED demand) to make it worth the effort to visit and teach.

Basically, it all depends on how VOCAL you guys are and while I have, say, a lot of loyal readers from Chicago, I've only taught once there.

So I thought I'd do a little experiment. I ran across this cool little widget called Eventful that allows performers to ask their readership and audience to "demand" that their favorite artist come to their city. Be it the sleepy town of Podunk, Nebraska to the sprawling metropolis of New York, anyone, anywhere, and at anytime can "demand" that they come to their city.

Give it a shot and let me know where you'd like to see myself and other members of the ABCs team! It's anonymous and private so let your voice be heard!

UPCOMING BOOTCAMPS:


UPCOMING SEMINARS:
FREE EVENTS:

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FlashNews Alert: Asian Playboy Defies Stereotypes


Hello fans!

The other day I did a phone interview with a reporter from Flash News and who has since written a small piece about me. Check it out it even includes a little bit of the Asian Discount Kiss-Close!

Asian Playboy Defies Stereotypes

LOS ANGELES (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – Despite cultural stereotypes, Asian guys can be as hot and sexy as any other lover.

So says JT “The Asian Playboy,” a master pick-up artist who teaches nerdy, shy guys how to be successful with women through his intense bootcamps in Los Angeles, New York, and San Francisco.

He teaches communication and confidence skills and then takes dudes to “the field” – bars and clubs – for hands-on learning.

Though he’ll guide anyone through the world of women, JT works primarily with minorities, and 75 percent of his students are Asian.

He embraces the motto “be successful because you’re Asian, not in spite of it,” and believes guys can use their culture to score.

For instance, since Asians tend to look younger than they are, JT recommends using the “Asian discount,” to their advantage.

He often tells women that “if you kiss an Asian guy you become 10 years younger yourself,” which always ends in a lip-lock.

JT hopes that through his bootcamp, Asian stereotypes can be broken and his fellow boys can be regarded as Casanovas.
For more field tested tactics that are Asian-enhanced, download your free copy of the "Enter the PUA" mini-ebook by subscribing to my newsletter!

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(Advanced) Conveying Sexuality


What often puts men in the friend zone is their inability to be seen by the woman as a sexual partner. For the less sexually experienced man it can be a daunting experience that sometimes causes anxiety when attempting to escalate sexually with a woman.

Additionally, as great as conversation is it doesn't get you laid. Let's face it. A woman wants a man who can please her in all types of ways. It can be emotionally, but usually means sexually.

Of course you can balance the two if you know how, but we're going to be discussing the latter in this article.

Passive Value

Your passive value is a determining factor in how a women perceives how fuckable you are. When men look at a woman's attire we can usually come to a conclusion about how sexual a woman is by the way she dresses. regardless of how true it is. A woman in a turtleneck sweater and khakis does not look as sexual as a woman with a low cut dress and a mini-skirt. Alternatively, a man does not seem to possess much sexuality when he's wearing a fully buttoned up polo shirt that's tucked in to his cargo shorts and sporting a bowl cut. It's important to keep in mind that your fashion is an extension of how you view yourself.

Fashion can be negated when you have a recognizable social status and reputation. If you look at Brad Pitt in, "Fight Club" he's wearing a tight fish net t-shirt. It's probably one of the gayest looking articles of clothing that can be worn but he still manages to maintain his masculinity in it. He can pull it off because he's Brad Pitt. If you're known to be around tons of beautiful women, then other women assume that you've probably slept with a good number of them. At that point it doesn't really matter what you wear.

Body language communicates sexuality in a subtle way. When you occupy more space, move slowly, have good eye contact, and have good posture it conveys confidence. It also shows that you're aware of how you're being perceived. Your body language can be interpreted as how you feel on the inside. Women usually associate a man with good body language as possessing higher levels of sexuality than a man who does not have good body language.

Sexual Attitude

Having a sexual attitude is important when conveying sexuality to a woman. Here's why...
If the woman is spending time with you then there is always a chance for her to become sexually interested in you in the interaction. Let it be known that if you're sexually attracted to her that she understands this. Be bold and don't hold back.


If the woman is spending time with you then there is always a chance for her to become sexually interested in you in the interaction. Let it be known that if you're sexually attracted to her that she understands this. Be bold and don't hold back. If you have to think about taking her hands and putting it around your neck to eventually kiss her then you're not conveying sexuality. You're conveying nervousness and a lack of confidence in yourself. Believe that women can be attracted to you. How would you feel if a woman would've fucked you had she known that you weren't just trying to be her friend? Probably not so good.

Let's take a step back. When a woman is smiling, sitting with you, chatting and occasionally touching you (we call these IOI's or indicators of interest) then assume it's okay to move forward. From the moment you get your first few IOI's just turn on that sexual attitude. Turn the conversation into sexual bantering (flirting), talk about sex, raise her BT and just go straight into direct interest. Having the attitude of, "I'm sexually attracted to you, I know you're sexually attracted to me too, but I'm not going to make it that easy for you to sleep with me" is a great way of building sexual tension and sexual attraction in the woman. Don't back down, but don't be a date rapist either. Remember, take two steps forward and one step back.

Shit Tests

If the woman is really into you then she'll most likely give you shit tests. At this point she's really considering fucking you and she doesn't want to be hooking up with a phony. Occasionally she'll attempt to ward off your sexual advances in a few ways. So your conversation is turning sexual and she tells you that you've probably cheated on all of your girlfriends. Don't take this as an insult, but as a shit test. A test of your confidence and to see if you can really back up your talk. I prefer to use cocky/funny and would probably say something along the lines of, "Wow! I don't usually get accused of cheating this early...don't you think we should get to know each other first?" This turns the tables around on her. You'll probably get a few more shit tests throughout the interaction.

When you're sexually escalating she may ward off your kino just a little bit. If you attempt to kiss her and she stops abruptly or moves your hand away from her vagina then just take a step down the compliance ladder. So if you were going for a kiss on the lips and she rejects it, just move to holding her hands or kissing her somewhere else. If you were rubbing her vagina, then move down the ladder and just rub her inner thighs near her vagina. Continue moving one step forward and one step back until you get to wherever you were planning on going. In case you didn't know, sex is the last step of the escalation ladder.

A few other notes

It's important to qualify the woman to gauge her level of sexuality. That's why it's important to get into sexual conversation. If she's comfortable talking about sex then she'll probably be more comfortable with your sexual banter. If she's comfortable with your sexual banter then she'll most likely be comfortable with your sexual kino. I say this because some guys are afraid that they'll get slapped in the face or called a pervert. You won't get slapped in the face and if you do get called a pervert it's probably because your delivery was a little off.

Of course, when you work on your holistic game and your verbal attraction you will run into this problem less frequently. Remember, if you're going to be around a woman it's important to convey sexuality. If not, you'll end up masturbating alone at home.

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Podcast: How Do You Prepare Yourself for a Pick-Up Bootcamp?

Podcast Episode For 4/05/09: (complete episode) : An Asian brother is flying all the way from Berlin, Germany to take the New York city Special Bootcamp and asks the question, "What should I do before I take a bootcamp?"
  • Chapter 1: Asian American Stuff: Better Asian Man interviews Singer/Songwriter Vudoo Soul (download this chapter)

  • Chapter 2: Q & A - Better Asian Man fields all of your questions about how to meet ladies -- LIVE! (download this chapter)

    1. "What should I do to prepare for the bootcamp? I don't usually hang out at night clubs." - H., Germany

    2. "What kind of mind-set should I have during the bootcamp?" - H, Germany

    3. "Can you teach me some AMOG defensive tactics on the first night of the bootcamp?" - H., Germany

    4. "Should I attend the ABCs of Attraction alumni reunion, even though it occurs before my bootcamp starts?" - H., Germany

Listen to this week's podcast now.

Download this episode.

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How to Pull a Girl into Your Asian World (ie the Asian/Exotic Attraction Switch)


There are two types of Asian naturals that I've come across in my adventures across the globe. There's the "Azn Pride" type who drives imports, hangs out only in the Asian side of town, dates only Asian girls and acts/is street. The other type, colliquially known as "White Washed", are the ones who hang out only with their white friends, dates only white girls, and is ashamed of bringing a white girl home because he's afraid his mom is going to embarass him with her FOBby accent and foreign ways.

In either case, these guys are decently successful with women, but it's usually IN SPITE of being Asian rather than BECAUSE they're Asian. In other words, one rejects it in total and the other goes to the extreme and zealously embraces it blindly. In either case, it defines them versus being simply and NATURALLY part of who they are.

And one of the interracial dating strategies that I use, is that I use my "Asianness" to my advantage. Being Asian is who I am no matter what. I'm not going to shove it in people's faces, but it's there and I'm not going to ignore it. And, in fact, I've found ways to use being Asian to be more successful in the dating scene considering that, in many cases, women have weak frames and you can easily pull a woman into your reality of being a man with a real defined sense of identity and culture.

So here are 5 APB-Approved Asian Edges YOU can do to pull a white/black/latin girl into your Asian world:
  1. Take Off Your Shoes - Always have a shoe rack. And a coat rack. Always. The first thing the girl does when she comes over to your crib is to DISROBE. And if she ask why? Just tell her your Asian. I have NEVER had it not work. Women accept your frame and reality as part of the culture. Which in turn becomes a passed Compliance Test. It's a small little thing, but- hey- now she's more physically comfortable with you at home. This comes in handy especially when you're disrobing her and want to use the patented ABCs 2-Step Clothes Remover!
  2. Chopsticks are Fun! - If you're going to go eat, I always like to take her to some Asian restaurant. Not sushi (unless she's down) as I've run across many (usually non-East/West coasters) who aren't adventureous enough to try raw fish. Places like pho (for that quaint, "mom & pop" shop feeling) to Beinehana's (for the cooking show). And I ALWAYS tease her about the way she holds her chopsticks. I'll poke fun at her saying how she needs the "baby chopsticks with rubber bands." And if the vibe is right, I'll even feed her with the chopsticks.
  3. Experienced Asian Man Attraction Switch - This is like being a wine connoisseur. You want to know your stuff, but not come off as bragging. You want to be able to educate her about certain aspects of your life, but without coming off as either pedantic or showy. For example, if the topic is travel, I can skip from talking about England to how there's a similar legend in Vietnam with our own version of Excalibur and other myths about princesses and other romantic figures.
  4. Exotic Asian Man Attraction Switch - Similar to the above, but here we start talking about those "exotic Oriental sex secrets." LOL, yeah I know, sounds goofy, but it works. From the tantric sex, to the Kama Sutra, to shiatsu massages, don't be afraid to work it in there if A) It's something your familiar with and B) It flows with the conversation and progress of the relationship.
  5. Teach Her Naughty Words - Everyone wants to know how to cuss in a foreign language. It's just human nature. So teach how to say, "I like it doggie style" and then tell her what it means AFTER she says it. Gets a naughty laugh everytime!
Other stories and maneuvers I have in my toolbelt:
  • Paradigm Shift Opener
  • Cool Asian Mom Story
  • Matriach Story (Pre-Selected by Family Members)
  • Asian Discount Banter
  • Asian Discount Prince Kiss Close
  • Scandinavian Models Story
  • Interracial Babies Qualification
  • and a whole bunch more that I can't remember off the top of my head.
Some of these items I do teach during an ABCs of Attraction bootcamp, but not all of them or even most of them as the bootcamps- while integrating some aspects of interracial dating & pickup- is primarily designed to give you a Holistic Gameplan versus over specialization.

So try them out here, make some of your own, and let me know how it goes!

Oh, and don't forget, download your free copy of the "Enter the PUA" teaser ebook (that discusses some of these strategies) by subscribing to the ABCs of Attraction Newsletter in the signup form at the top. Some of the stories I listed here will be disclosed in an upcoming product line so be the first ones in line when I announce what and when it is!

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Learning Gimmicky Tactics vs a Holistic Structure


Once you've learned how to STICK YOUR APPROACH and to do so with simply through sheer non-verbal body language, subcommunication, and a simple 30 second verbal approach, and do so CONSISTENTLY with MORE ATTRACTION, then why the hell waste 10 seconds reciting an FTC? You don't need to.

I think people tend to forget that a lot of tactics are just training wheels and sooner or later, it's time to put them away.
So I got involved in a rather lengthy email discussion about the various companies and methodologies out there and what was the major difference between the ABCs and others. And he was wondering about the efficacy of taking other companies bootcamps after ours. He was also afraid of falling into the Indirect trap, which is a valid concern, no doubt.

To which I will now provide you with a 5 point answer...

1) TACTICS VERSUS STRUCTURE:
So what you'd receive from them, after taking a bootcamp with us, is their specialized training in things like social circle, hot game, or day game or "natural game" and so forth. What the ABCs gives you is a foundation, a structure, a gameplan. From there, you can choose to specialize as a direct guy, a entourage guy, etc or remain a "jack of all trades." Other companies tend to specialize in methodologies and specific tactics, which we don't.

We simple give you enough tools, a working palette so to speak. It's up to you what you draw and with what colors. We're more interested in giving you the COMPLETE gameplan versus specializing in one particular tactic that may or may not suit your personality to begin with since everyone student that comes to us has different goals and personalities.

2) WHAT IS A HOLISTIC STRUCTURE?
For one thing, I think the ABCs isn't about gimmicks and tactics (though we have those), but about having a complete gameplan by having, what we call, a HOLISTIC STRUCTURE.

The ABCs curriculum is setup in such a way that it takes people through the natural progression of beginner level to expert level. So yes, that does mean learning Indirect, to Direct, to Situational, to Lifestyle, etc. While you may be comfortable as more Direct, there are situations and women that demand an Indirect only style. Same as there are women (who are giving you "fuck me" eyes) that demand a purely Direct style. The idea is that the ABCs provides you with and trains you in the COMPLETE SYSTEM OF GAME. From there, you take it where you will.

I'm going to quote from a post I made on the ABCs forums...
"I definitely believe that minorities need to master Direct Game in order to acquire the "Asian Edge" (thus the 30 day direct challenge), but I also believe that you need to be versatile and socially experienced which is usually mastered via application of indirect game.

Even if you could consistently stick your Direct opener (ie Kamikaze), if you can't keep the banter interesting and the conversation going, then you're still stuck in the opening phases.

So for students, I suggest spending 6 months on indirect game in order to be competent at it, 6 months on direct game, another 6 months combining them, and then a final 6 months incorporating them into your lifestyle.

The end result, you'll find, is that most of us, while we follow the ABCs structure, have completely different styles or inclinations. And even those styles change over time as we grow and gain experience. That's one of the nice things about the ABCs structure, it's plug and play versus being static and unmalleable.

Now once you get mastered the basics and have the complete gameplan and system, THEN you can add flourishes and icing to your cake. If you notice, all of us at the ABCs have wildly different styles and personalities when it comes to our preferred Game."

Johnny and Showtime are more to the center left or "indirect" side with an emphasis on social circle Game. William is to the far right and into direct game. Kevin is about far left due to influences from the VH1 show. Ozzie's about moderate right. For myself, I'd say I'm center right, but when I lived in Dallas, I was moderate left because I had an extensive night life social circle. But as time went on, I found I just didn't have the energy or inclination to maintain it."

3) BREAKING DOWN THE FALSE TIME CONSTRAINT (FTC):
Let's take another tactics vs holistic approach example. Take a look at the FTC (False Time Constraint) invented by guru genius and master pick up artist, Neil Strauss. It's designed to relieve pressure from the interaction, make you appear harmless, and slip in under the radar. It works.

Let me say that again, the FTC absolutely WORKS. It's designed to making opening sets and getting invested into them without being blown out easier (and if you do get blown out, your ego's protected since you're already leaving).

However, once you've learned how to STICK YOUR APPROACH and to do so with simply through sheer non-verbal body language, subcommunication, and a simple 30 second verbal approach, and do so CONSISTENTLY with MORE ATTRACTION, then why the hell waste 10 seconds reciting an FTC? You don't need to.

I think people tend to forget that a lot of tactics are just training wheels and sooner or later, it's time to put them away.

4) FOUNDATION & UNDERSTANDING:
Here's another disadvantage of simply learning tactics, they don't give you a FOUNDATION to build off of. I mean, you read about the FTC online, you think it's awesome, you use it, and it works. But do you actually understand WHY? Can you dissect the elements and reconstruct them into part of your personality or into other tactics and maneuvers that you already do when conversing with people?

When you understand WHY things work, you can get rid of the extra bits and only keep what you need or want.

5) NORMAL & BORING
VERSUS SEXY & GLAMOROUS
It's the old turtle versus the hare condundrum.

I mean, I'll admit it. Tactics are cool. They're glamorous. They've got catchy phrases and GREAT marketing.

A structure's about long term improvement with the occassional short term fix to get you over the bumps. It's not as sexy. And it doesn't sound as great on the forums.

But are you really there to impress your internet friends with your Level 70 MPUA Avatar and the 1000+ posts you made on your online MMPORG-Forum?


Or are you here to improve yourself, give you a complete understanding, a complete toolset and be happy with yourself and the journey you're on?

Anyways, that's my little two cents on tactics versus structure.

Until I see you next time at an ABCs Reunion, happy hunting!

Sincerely,
JT the Asian Playboy
1-888-689-GAME

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4 Ways to Build Comfort with Women

When you're uncomfortable around a woman this can be conveyed in numerous ways. It can be identified through the choice of words you use, your tone, body language, and other forms of non-verbal communication. A man who is accustomed to being with beautiful and intelligent women behaves like a man who has choices with these types of women.
The better you are at making the woman comfortable is when you will get much better at keeping the woman with you. I've seen a lot of situations in which the woman isn't entirely comfortable with the man she's with and will either leave when given the opportunity or escorted away by someone else.

You can have her buying temperature really high and she may even want to sleep with you but that can all change very quickly.

How many times have you had a woman get taken away from you by her friend to go to the bathroom at the nightclub?

How many times have you seen another guy try to take a girl away from you?

There are external methods that we teach at the ABCs of Attraction to prevent this from happening and they work well. However, we also teach how to make things easier for you so that you put in minimal effort to get the girl with the best results.

Having the ability to build comfort with a woman in any setting will make it so that you won't have to try so hard to deal with external circumstances that can ruin a good time. Here are a few things to keep in mind when building comfort with a woman:

1. Don't force anything

No matter how you convey this to a woman it should be important to let her know that she isn't being forced for any reason to be with you. If she's with you, she should be with you because she likes you.

Hookups for anything or other forms of supplication means that the only reason for why she's with you are for those reasons only. A low valued male will use these perks to keep the woman by threatening to take them away.

Another thing low valued males do is put women on a guilt trip to keep them around. Some guys will physically prevent women from walking away which I've seen and look down upon.

Women will feel like they are in danger if a guy gets physical with them and that is obviously counterproductive to making a woman feel comfortable.

Maintaining self control and being relaxed around a woman let her know that she can be herself around you. Since she isn't feeling pressured into doing anything or behaving a certain way; she will feel more free to express herself to you.

This is where you will have women more receptive to your sexual advances.

2. Test for compliance...

We teach this extensively at the ABCs of Attraction bootcamps. It's essential for you to understand this concept when building comfort with a woman. You'll find it extremely difficult to have sex with a woman upon first meeting her by simply whipping out your penis.

It just doesn't work that way. You have to gradually build up to that type of comfort. You test for compliance by checking to see how much she's willing to go along with what you're doing. If she lets you kiss her on the lips then she most likely will let you kiss her on the cheeks.

Testing for compliance lets the woman know that you're not going to either manipulate her or force yourself upon her while still giving her the option to stay with you or not.

3. You must be comfortable

When you're uncomfortable around a woman this can be conveyed in numerous ways. It can be identified through the choice of words you use, your tone, body language, and other forms of non-verbal communication. A man who is accustomed to being with beautiful and intelligent women behaves like a man who has choices with these types of women.

If you're uncomfortable being around beautiful women then make it a point to start getting in some experience with beautiful women. You'll realize that they're not too different from everybody else, but in order to get past their physical beauty you need to make it a point to internalize the belief that beauty is common.

4. Be around women

Whether it's a sister, a friend, or a co-worker it really helps to have women around you. When you're around other women it shows that you can be with women and not be a creep about it. You're most likely not a rapist if you have women around you often and safety is important to a woman.

To learn more about this check out the article on the Importance of Having Female Friends.

These are just a few ways to help you get an idea of how comfort works when you're attempting to game women. The more you are able to connect with a woman, the better you will be at generating comfort.

The whole concept of making people feel comfortable around you stems from how socially experienced you are which can encompass your conversational skills, knowledge of social rules, emotional intelligence, and other social factors. Knowing how important it is to make a woman comfortable is a big step in keeping women with you.

This is what it means when we say that the ABCs of Attraction teaches "Holistic Game." Its a combination of all the factors that take a beginner to an expert, combining Verbal Attraction, Inner Game, and Outer Confidence into one supremely confident whole MAN.

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